Hi everyone! It has been a month since I have last written, though I have definitely thought about it. I have been through so many changes- physical and emotional. In this last month, in addition to my new puppy, I moved into a new home, went through a couple of serious family emergencies, and injured my leg through it all. It has been a challenge, but I am working through it.
I am still having panic attacks- which I must say are still as un-enjoyable as ever. It is difficult to explain to others why I leave a situation when it seems like I am in the midst of doing something, but for now, this is the only way to deal with the overwhelming feelings I get. I just recently spoke with my doctor about this, and he prescribed a medication that is supposed to help me, so long as I remember to take it- that is the key- I need to remember to take it... remember what???
My memory is still struggling. I have tried EMDR, and I had a couple of break-through memories of my life- changing incident, which is good, but the struggle with the day-to-day is still just as strong. I am still off work, and it looks like I will be for a while. This has been a challenge to deal with, as I may have mentioned before, but I don't know how I could handle the stress of working in addition to the stress I feel I deal with daily.
It would be nice if a day could go by without having a reminder about my TBI. In hurting my leg, I was placed on crutches and a "boot". The problem is, I have problems with my balance just standing- it is now 10 fold! It is interesting when I randomly lose my balance in the boot- I rock forward and use a wall or what ever I can to stop. LOL! This makes me laugh, otherwise it would make me cry.
I am all over the place in today's blog. I will admit that I am tired, and I am feeling overwhelmed, though I am not sure why. A feeling I am getting more and more used to, but I still don't like it. My brain fatigue has been very consistent; however, I am determined to try to work through it... if only it was like a pulled muscle... :)
On a lighter note, today is the day Marty McFly visited in Back to the Future, Part 2... I don't think that we have everything portrayed in the movie, but it is still fun to know that it is possible. If self-tying shoes and a blow-dryer jacket are possible- I think that continued progression is possible to!
Be the reason someone chose not to give-up.
Photo credit to https://beacon.wharton.upenn.edu/entrepreneurship/2014/11/scale-your-mindset/