First off, let me say how much I really dislike naming each post. LOL. It's actually kind of difficult. LOL.
So, about PERSPECTIVE, this morning I woke-up, and got myself and the kids ready to take to school. My husband was up late working on homework, and was still asleep. As I was putting my shoes on, it dawned on me how lucky I am.
All head injury/TBI aside, how many people can say that they have the time with their family that I do? Before I had to leave work, I was making enough money to support our family. So, we decided that my husband would be a full-time student and finally finish up the last couple semesters of his degree, and I would cover the bills. Though he still worked through this time, my income was the main financial support.
Needless to say, when the time came this year that my job was no longer conducive to my recovery, and I had to stop working, the next bump in the recovery road on occurred. Where was (is) our income? Fortunately, as a benefit I opted for short-term disability. This has been our income. Though, they do not like to pay regularly, as I have experienced, and will deny claims for their own errors. Regardless of this complaint, and of the financial stress and credit card dependency that has since occurred since my head injury, we have managed.
So as I was saying, this morning, all stress and road bumps aside, I realized that I am TRULY LUCKY. My family has seen other adversity, and survived. I am surviving. We all love each-other and through thick and thin, no matter what, we stick with each other and make the best we can of it all. We all have new perspectives on what is important to us. And we cherish each other and our time.
So this morning, as my husband was sleeping and the chaos of the morning ritual ensued, I realized that so many people miss out on these things- whether by choice or circumstance. I am truly lucky that I get to be a conscious part of my own life. I did lose some of who I was when I fell and injured my head- but, I get to create myself again. There are definitely parts of me that I lost, and I still cry for no matter how positive I try to remain (meds help though :) ), but at least I get to be a part of my recovery. It doesn't go on without me. I get to see my husband, and run around like crazy with my children. I get to clean-up puppy and child messes around the house. I get to live. Really live. My Dad used to tell me that the best part of life was knowing that it could end at any time- it made every moment worth it.
So, today, I had a new perspective. It's okay to cry for the part of you that was lost, and the pain and frustration that happens when you are creating yourself. Just be sure to stop and look around. There are reasons to be thankful for your life. New perspectives. Life's joy.
This has been me recently. I have a hard time answering the question of "how are you feeling " or even "how are you ". Sometimes I say I'm "fine " because I don't want to deal with it ; however. some people really want to know. I don't know how to answer this. I don't even remember having a day when I didn't feel some side effect of my TBI. I Anquan know my head is on my shoulders, it just needs an "out of order " sign sometimes. Please tell me how YOU answer this question.
Be the reason someone chose not to give-up.
Photo credit to https://beacon.wharton.upenn.edu/entrepreneurship/2014/11/scale-your-mindset/