It has been a busy few days since I last wrote. I am very excited about the logo, and am looking at fully purchasing it- it would be cool to be able to re-print it on more than the website and small scale items like letterhead. I am hoping that this blog will start to reach people for support. :)
This weekend was very busy. My son is turning 13, so we celebrated his birthday. It was great to see him so happy, and to have my friends and family there to celebrate with us. He is a GREAT kid. My how time flies. Time flies for everyone with children and loved ones. In relation to my TBI, the biggest issue in relation to time is that I have lost memories- especially from right after the event extending a few months. My son was telling me today that I made him an email account, and I did not even know I did this. This was of concern as we have a safety rule about social media, email, and passwords, and I did not even recall something I did, in order to follow-up on it. I am lucky that my son is a good boy and I have little to worry about, but it still bothers me. It makes me wonder how many other "little" things, that I may think are "big" things, that I have forgotten. Some more recent lost memories, such as missed events and incomplete work, are easier to take note of, as I tend to get a reminder of my forgetfulness (sometimes not pleasant, but a reminder none-the-less).
Events such as day-to-day activities, play dates with my children, time with my husband or family, are lost. This is very difficult to deal with. Though my memory is improving now, I do not yet have recollection of those missing from over eight months after my injury, and very sporadic from then until now. I have some recollection from about nine to ten months post injury, but they are related to very strong emotions. I need to celebrate that there is some information I am remembering more, but I have noticed that they are tied to stronger emotion, and I write them down in one place. That helps. I no longer need to look at several different papers and calendars to recall something. (It definitely helps because I would forget where I wrote it down to remind myself. LOL!)). I bought my nephew a funny gift that I have been meaning to give him since December 2014, and I put it somewhere I would not forget- and cannot find it now. I am sure this happens to most of us at one point or another, but it is the repeated pattern of the misplacement that drives me crazy! I am following the doctor's recommendations to help with the ADD and subsequent focus and attention issues that should help with my memory- but it is a long road! The good news is that the new me is more patient than the "old" me was. Thank goodness!
If you are reading this, whether you have experienced a TBI or not, I would like to know how your memory is? Do you have some tricks to share that can help with recollection? You do not need to put your name, but please comment with some tips. I would love to hear them, and maybe post them on a new "tips" page. Thanks!
I also spent some time talking with my aunt this weekend. It was an interesting and enlightening conversation. I was talking to her about the changes I need- and want- to make, and some of my plans. She was very supportive, which was so great. In talking with her, she reminded me of her hospitalization for a head injury she sustained a couple of years ago. She talked to me about the headaches and the pain she was in for nearly a year afterward. She talked with me about the changes it brought about, and even some of the changes she actually welcomed and is happy to still have. She told me about how before her head injury, she did not have the motivation to go back and complete school, or even learn too many new things. However, since this, she has returned to school, completed her Bachelor's in Nursing, and is now working on her Master's degree- and celebrated her 60th birthday. We talked about some of the symptoms and issues I still deal with, such as the ADD, headaches, sleep issues, multi-tasking issues, and even depreciation in confidence, and those similarities and differences to what she has experienced. We talked about how though it has been a couple of years already, she still has problems with sleeping, but actually welcomes some of the ADD symptoms. She is now able to focus more on tasks she wants to complete, and has a plan for who she wants to be. She said her head injury "made her smarter"; I chuckled at this. I think she has always been smart, but I think it is that she now has a plan for herself, that she did not have before. I think she is happy with having to create herself again, because she can make herself who she wants to be - and is well on her way. At that moment, I realized how proud I was to be her niece- and how proud I was at her taking such a difficult ordeal and making it into something so great for herself. She is doing what I aspire to do.
After talking, she still struggles with sleep issues, in that she can sleep all the time, though not well. I too have this issue- I can fall asleep quickly if I do not keep busy; however, if I keep too busy, I get a headache which causes another cycle. She still experiences some of these same issues on occasion, though she says they are not as frequent, and can actually use them more to her advantage.
It is obvious to me that she has identified and developed the coping skills she needs to get through her challenges, and it felt so great to talk in person with someone else who could understand some of the issues I was going through, first hand. It was also great to speak with someone who was in a place I am trying to get to- a place of not only acceptance, but action. I think there is room for me to more actively participate in my own life. Maybe for you too?
Be the reason someone chose not to give-up.
Photo credit to https://beacon.wharton.upenn.edu/entrepreneurship/2014/11/scale-your-mindset/